Roughly five years ago I was looking to contact a friend I knew from college. Long story short I didn’t go about it the right way and her parents got mad at me.
Fast forward five years and I feel incredibly remorseful about what I did. I’ve been told I should just forget about the whole ordeal, but the whole situation lives rent-free in my head no matter how hard I try not to think about it. I don’t want to risk disturbing her again, but I also don’t want to pull a Matthew Broderick and never apologize/admit responsibility for a grave mistake. Any thoughts?
Just ask yourself one question. Are you doing this to soothe your own feelings? It sure sounds like that. So just put away the “but I want to do the right thing” bit and recognize that sometimes the right thing to do is nothing.
Yep - are you apologizing for them, or for yourself?
So Matthew Broderick was right to not apologize for killing those two people? And National Day for Truth and Reconciliation is wrong? That’s what I seem to be getting at.
To answer the question of what Matthew Broderick should do, I would need to have some information about what the victims/family want. Do they want an apology and public statement? They should get one. Do they want to be left alone? They should be.
The thing is YOU DO already have this information. They want to be left alone. You want to violate that and contact them to apologize for… contacting them before?
This isn’t hard dude. You aren’t Matthew Broderick. You didn’t kill anyone. You have an unhealthy fascination with this person from the very beginning of your story and you are working VERY hard to convince yourself that exercising it is in fact a moral imperative for you.
It is not. The only thing you can do for these people is leave them alone and digest your own feelings about it. Get therapeutic help, please.
Or just, you know, move on with your life.
You said it, not us.
Holy shit that’s the stupidest thing I’ve read all day. It has nothing to do with your petty personal demons. Go educate yourself and/or delete your account on Lemmy.ca.
Here’s a start: https://www.canada.ca/en/canadian-heritage/campaigns/national-day-truth-reconciliation.html
I know very well what National Day for Truth and Reconciliation is; no need to remind me. And the reason I brought up Matthew Broderick is because he is a vile piece of shit who killed two people, had no remorse and is still in showbiz. I simply don’t want to be like Broderick by not apologizing.
Why do you feel like not contacting someone so that you can feel better about a mistake is the same as killing someone?
Seems like a moral justification for bothering someone (for no reason other than to assuage your guilt) and comes off entitled as hell.
This is akin to Matthew Broderick begging for forgiveness from the victim’s family despite knowing they don’t want to give it. Stop.